'g'od

WARNING: Lots of offense towards any and all religions. Mostly Christianity. Many bad Heaven and Jesus puns. Consider yourself warned.

So, maybe this offends a bunch of people. Goodness knows it wouldn't be the first time I've done that.

So, I've been thinking a lot about god recently. (lowercase 'g') Yes, god. The almighty ruler. The guy who wrote everything down and thought everything out and has everything figured out for you. Jesus Christ, he's GUIDING you through life man. Who knew?

If you know me, you know I've been a staunch Atheist. I ran around between being Agnostic and a strange mix of Pagan and Wiccan for a few years, before saying fuck it. Whatever. I then became an Apathist which is a very fitting religion for me. No praying. No rosary's. No sin. Just "'I don't know. And I don't care either,"

Anyway, I've finally put all of my thoughts on this whole 'god' issue.

Frankly, I think most devote religious people are weak in character. Or maybe they're all just crazy. After all, if a mental patient explained how there's a man in the sky that hears everything we think and controls everything that happens everywhere, well, there's a reason he's a mental patient now isn't there?

There's something in these characters that makes them believe they need a crutch, and heavens, what better crutch is there then god?

After all, god has everything planned. You're life was mapped out before birth dude. You can't possibly fuck it up. You wrecked your car? Whatever. Gods Will. Girlfriend Pregnant? Gods will, go marry her and pray for your sins. Child murderer? Accept Christ as your savior and all is forgiven. Good for you kid.

But I want to tell you something. This is a deep, dark secret that not everyone wants to be privy too, because, well, it can be a bit hard to accept.

But let's face it kids.

Sometimes you're just a fuck up.

And the magic man in the sky doesn't have a god-damned thing to do with it.

Ouch.